It has been said that people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I like to think that this is true for there is no greater teacher than first hand experience.
Friends are like jewelry.
There are the cosmetic ones, not real...but at a glance one may not be able to tell without a skillfully discerning eye. Usually bought for a reason; to compliment an outfit to an upcoming event but it is universally known that the probability of its endurance past that is quite low.
(if you are allergic to Nickel like I am, ignoring all warnings and proceeding to wear it will only end in pain)
So one can lament the loss of the accessory but must too be grateful that in the moment it brought much joy. I have lost many great friends along that way and this often saddens me to think that someone who once meant so much is no longer a part of my life. But looking back, the memories of those times will always be treasured even though we are strangers now.
Next are the silver friends...not the most precious element but still of substantial value. Usually received as a present on a birthday or holiday and as such is worn for the duration of its sentimental value or until the season is over. Then it is forgotten in the jewelry bowl and becomes tarnished, never able to really regain its initial shine.
These I like to think of more as the 'symbiotic relationship of the human world' rather than a friendship. It is based upon the mutualism at that point in time and usually comes with an expiration date.
Finally...are the diamonds. The ones of most worth and when they enter it's for a lifetime.
These priceless pieces are treasured and loved. They carry the ability to lighten any mood and beautify any situation. These are the friendships that do not need words...
It takes having only a few in the collection to not have to worry about the reasons or the seasons of the others. Always taking comfort in the fact that they were formed under pressure and so can weather any storm :)
Monday, 9 May 2011
Saturday, 16 April 2011
Shibumi
A friend of mine said to me recently "you are always waiting for the PERFECT moment meanwhile your life is passing by"...or something like that.
I spent a lot of time thinking about this.
As much as I like the Carpe Diem philosophy and I'd love to take life simply as it comes; it's obvious my neurotic nature does not always allow for that. It is difficult for someone who strives for perfection to adapt to this since life is the one thing we have little or no control over. Despite attempts or our sincerest willing of the outcome of a situation, we are but victims of fate and may never get these 'perfect moments' that we have fabricated over time in our minds.
Especially being a young girl, so greatly influenced by fairytales and love stories about the way these special moments should be; I personally have not had the experiences Walt Disney so elaborately described. However I have had a lot of great moments and it is important to remember in life though that things may not always play out as you had imagined but often times the non-cliche alternative is better...filled with all the imperfections that will eventually translate to originality.
So I have found that I do in fact miss out on something great in front of me because it does not match the perfect non-realistic picture I've painted. But after much bathtub-contemplation I have contraversly concluded (despite all previously mentioned points in the arguement) that I cannot change who I am...
And I am and always will be...a dreamer
So although the sacrament of love still eludes me and travelling the world is at this point in my career impractical, I can still dream of romantic sunsets or living in Peru for it is faith that keeps hope alive...and hope is the essence of our human existence.
It may be naive(the heart is rarely ever practical)I still have hope that I will one day experience these perfect moments.
"there are moments of such pure,sublime,unparalleled perfection that will force you to close your eyes and hold on to these as best you can. Life is a series of these moments. Everything else is just waiting for them." -Iain Thomas
I spent a lot of time thinking about this.
As much as I like the Carpe Diem philosophy and I'd love to take life simply as it comes; it's obvious my neurotic nature does not always allow for that. It is difficult for someone who strives for perfection to adapt to this since life is the one thing we have little or no control over. Despite attempts or our sincerest willing of the outcome of a situation, we are but victims of fate and may never get these 'perfect moments' that we have fabricated over time in our minds.
Especially being a young girl, so greatly influenced by fairytales and love stories about the way these special moments should be; I personally have not had the experiences Walt Disney so elaborately described. However I have had a lot of great moments and it is important to remember in life though that things may not always play out as you had imagined but often times the non-cliche alternative is better...filled with all the imperfections that will eventually translate to originality.
So I have found that I do in fact miss out on something great in front of me because it does not match the perfect non-realistic picture I've painted. But after much bathtub-contemplation I have contraversly concluded (despite all previously mentioned points in the arguement) that I cannot change who I am...
And I am and always will be...a dreamer
So although the sacrament of love still eludes me and travelling the world is at this point in my career impractical, I can still dream of romantic sunsets or living in Peru for it is faith that keeps hope alive...and hope is the essence of our human existence.
It may be naive(the heart is rarely ever practical)I still have hope that I will one day experience these perfect moments.
"there are moments of such pure,sublime,unparalleled perfection that will force you to close your eyes and hold on to these as best you can. Life is a series of these moments. Everything else is just waiting for them." -Iain Thomas
Thursday, 7 April 2011
Perspective
After recently experiencing a somewhat traumatic event and what I consider to be one of life's harsher lessons, I was consistently reassured by friends and family that 'everything happens for a reason'. When disappointed and in despair however, these words brought little comfort but I did not discard the implications suggested by this frequently uttered cliché nor the good intention of each well-wisher.
Adding to the previously mentioned cliché is the ever-so-popular 'time heals all wounds' which in fact, it does. So after the tears and heartache, nightmares and mild anhedonia; I now had 6 weeks of time on my hands so I sought to find this REASON that felt the need to prevent me from enjoying a once-in-a-lifetime experience.
Naturally I began using my time to start learning to do all the things I've always wanted to do but my hectic schedule did not permit: calligraphy, sign language, art, yoga, even this blog. As well as having time to read novels I've always been meaning to read and more importantly strengthening friendships that had become strained. I finally had time...
Funny thing about life when it gets so hectic and living occurs simply from one event to the next; I realised how easy it is to miss so many important things. So I had not even accomplished anything yet, but I was already seeing part of the reason. I was now forced to slow down, forced to re-evaluate my life and re-establish my priorities which brings me to the point of all of this.
At some time or other throughout my life I've always been a part of a charitable organisation and have always been passionate about saving the environment and dedicating my time to help others in which ever way they may need it. So now, by what seemed to be a series of coincidental events or call it fate if you must...it appears I have found my reason.
Yesterday I attended hopefully the first of many meetings of the NGO Jericho who undertake projects that find the weakest members of society and try to uplift them. They have recently started a service called the Daily Soup whereby the members collect and donate raw materials and cook the soup themselves then distribute it to homeless people in POS, Chaguanas and San Fernando every day. They have several other major projects in the works and I encourage anyone who is interested in giving, even if not of your time but donations; to do so because we take for granted exactly how much we have and it definitely put things into perspective. Because while I am complaining and whining about missing a Taylor Swift concert I already had tickets for and the Junior Gong concert I was planning on going to, there are children right here in our communities who do not have proper clothing and are going to bed hungry every night.
Something to think about when we say we have 'nothing to wear' or 'do not know what to eat'...we at least have options...many people aren't that lucky...
Monday, 4 April 2011
Masterpiece
Words do not always describe how I feel
They do not know how to portray yearning
Do not show the progress when I heal
Or even the lesson that I am learning
Music seems to better understand
Perhaps it is more in tune with my heart
Whether I am hollow and empty or feeling grand
Or ready to clean the slate for a fresh start
Yet these lifeless channels I cannot blame
Not when I err was much as I do
And oft times I am the same
Unable to express or even grasp what I am going through
Although if I cannot decide for myself who will?
Should I just wait on destiny's course?
For I have been waiting for quite some time and still
seem to be at a loss
But just as all four seasons make the year
And each colour to the rainbow's essence contribute
So too does each radiant smile and glistening tear
make this masterpiece absolute
Life's experiences are but pressure to the coal
Redefining and are as such sublime
Creating inevitably a beautiful soul
That like diamonds...will come to be in time
Christine G. Francis
They do not know how to portray yearning
Do not show the progress when I heal
Or even the lesson that I am learning
Music seems to better understand
Perhaps it is more in tune with my heart
Whether I am hollow and empty or feeling grand
Or ready to clean the slate for a fresh start
Yet these lifeless channels I cannot blame
Not when I err was much as I do
And oft times I am the same
Unable to express or even grasp what I am going through
Although if I cannot decide for myself who will?
Should I just wait on destiny's course?
For I have been waiting for quite some time and still
seem to be at a loss
But just as all four seasons make the year
And each colour to the rainbow's essence contribute
So too does each radiant smile and glistening tear
make this masterpiece absolute
Life's experiences are but pressure to the coal
Redefining and are as such sublime
Creating inevitably a beautiful soul
That like diamonds...will come to be in time
Christine G. Francis
Sunday, 3 April 2011
Spring Solstace
Seasons change as sand through the hour glass fall
Barren remains leave us to wonder if anything was ever there at all
The rains fall beating out their pain against infertile earth
Desolate
And almost of no worth
Unimaginable...that the sun once so brightly shun...
Oh to turn back time to when it had all begun
But torrential rains bring to this earth hope anew
As little sprouts arise and from the ground poke through
Keeping faith that soon with life it will over run
Unimaginable...that it had ever been gone...
Christine G. Francis
Barren remains leave us to wonder if anything was ever there at all
The rains fall beating out their pain against infertile earth
Desolate
And almost of no worth
Unimaginable...that the sun once so brightly shun...
Oh to turn back time to when it had all begun
But torrential rains bring to this earth hope anew
As little sprouts arise and from the ground poke through
Keeping faith that soon with life it will over run
Unimaginable...that it had ever been gone...
Christine G. Francis
Incomplete
(true to its name I have never finished this piece despite many attempts to create the final stanza)
What are we, if not victims of circumstance?
Veterans come home from a war
Like dog tags we carry shattered remains of our hearts
Hung loosely at our fragile core
Who are we, if not prisoners to our own lives?
Trapped in memories of those unpleasant events
Despite attempts to graciously move on
And conceal the bruises and dents
Where are we, if not still in the past?
Unable to let it go
Broken...ghosts of our former selves
The present will never get a chance to know
When will we, if ever finally heal?
Though we all inevitably bear the scar
It will always be integrated into us
But must never define who we are
Why are we, clearly fooling ourselves?
Two tattered shards cannot make a whole one
But denying the future the opportunity to be
Will not make the past undone...
Christine G. Francis
What are we, if not victims of circumstance?
Veterans come home from a war
Like dog tags we carry shattered remains of our hearts
Hung loosely at our fragile core
Who are we, if not prisoners to our own lives?
Trapped in memories of those unpleasant events
Despite attempts to graciously move on
And conceal the bruises and dents
Where are we, if not still in the past?
Unable to let it go
Broken...ghosts of our former selves
The present will never get a chance to know
When will we, if ever finally heal?
Though we all inevitably bear the scar
It will always be integrated into us
But must never define who we are
Why are we, clearly fooling ourselves?
Two tattered shards cannot make a whole one
But denying the future the opportunity to be
Will not make the past undone...
Christine G. Francis
Passport to Paradise
Tortured by my own imagination
Plagued by lingering clouds of doubt
Unable to make sense of the situation
But there seems to be no way out...
Maybe I'll just run and forget all about this
Run away to the land of the free
Dance with the angels on moon beams from heaven
Close my eyes... and finally see...
I'll take that trip to beautiful Japan
Think soothing thoughts as I inhale hot Sake
Breathing out remnant memories of this life
Would you not come with me?
We'll run together along the frothy coasts
barefoot...in the sand
Sun-kissed skin and wind-tossed hair
Laughing and skipping hand in hand
But I'm afraid if you let my hand go
I will slip into the darkness and be lost
I'm afraid of taking chances
They often have an unknown cost...
So I allow my fear to drive me
Toward the edge and away from you
Hoping one day to be strong enough
And to my own self be true...
Christine G. Francis
Plagued by lingering clouds of doubt
Unable to make sense of the situation
But there seems to be no way out...
Maybe I'll just run and forget all about this
Run away to the land of the free
Dance with the angels on moon beams from heaven
Close my eyes... and finally see...
I'll take that trip to beautiful Japan
Think soothing thoughts as I inhale hot Sake
Breathing out remnant memories of this life
Would you not come with me?
We'll run together along the frothy coasts
barefoot...in the sand
Sun-kissed skin and wind-tossed hair
Laughing and skipping hand in hand
But I'm afraid if you let my hand go
I will slip into the darkness and be lost
I'm afraid of taking chances
They often have an unknown cost...
So I allow my fear to drive me
Toward the edge and away from you
Hoping one day to be strong enough
And to my own self be true...
Christine G. Francis
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